Recently I’ve been having a rough time… (Ha! When aren’t i!?) saying that, on the days that I’m with people I’ve been having such great times. So me (of all people) asked a friend to go out with me. (TWICE!!!) I never ask people… family yeah… at a push… once I’ve psyched myself up for it. Planned the rejection and how to phrase asking them… but anyway, yes i asked my friend to go out. We went on a tour of her town. (To add clarity, she lives in the town that my parents live in, and so i have been there but not alone, and not with people who arent family.) Anyway she showed me around the creepy places, so we could take pictures. (I really love taking pictures, but i struggle getting to places and going there alone. So it was refreshing to have the support, and interest of someone else. It seriously allowed me to get some great shots, and also boost my confidence!). My friend also has an interest in photography, and so she happily accompanied me in showing me the best places to get some shots! She also showed me around in general. It was so layed back and chilled. No pressure. I felt so at ease, yet i was venturing out of my comfort zone. I even caught a bus home alone twice, and then walked home from the bus stop. Usually i have to make stops inbetween each place i visit, or every time i get on a bus, or before i leave somewhere i have to go to the bathroom… but i didn’t have to as much. I felt safe and reassured, not only that but i had a great time! I felt freedom, i felt like i was living! Actually experiencing! (Don’t get me wrong, when I’m with family i feel this way too. So I’m not saying I never feel this freedom. It’s just to feel this way with someone from outside my family is new, and exciting, and i am so grateful for it!) There’s no stress with my friend. I honestly feel as though she’s a really positive force in my life. She persuades me to do new things, and do things i that i really want to do but feel scared to, without even trying. I feel like a normal 20 something when I’m with her. Well, maybe not, because we dont have to go specific places, or go for a drink or pay to go to places. She understands my anxiety and is perfectly happy to just go for walks, or go to the shops, and even sit in the park and talk. To other people it may seem boring and pointless. But when you have anxiety, the smallest of steps mean the most. The smallest journey seems like an adventure. And i appreciate all of it. I’m willingly pushing myself and that’s new. I’m choosing to go places with people, not just agreeing. Its new, but I’m really happy! I have a selfless, caring, understanding, amazing friend! I’m so happy for me and her. I really believe this could be a turning point in my life!